First-Date Safety in London: A Practical Checklist Before, During and After

How to use this checklist

This is a practical list, not a warning. Most dates go fine, and these steps take a couple of minutes. They are grouped by when you need them: before you go, at the venue, if something goes wrong with a drink, and afterwards. Everything comes from official or organisers' pages as read on 14 October 2026.

Night buses, the Night Tube, licensed minicabs and reporting incidents on TfL are covered in Kindrd's getting-home-safely guide, so they aren't repeated here. If you are in danger at any point, call 999.

Before you go: tell someone and set a check-in

Send one friend four things: where you're meeting, your date's name and how you met, the time you expect to leave, and when you'll message to say you're fine. Agree what they'll do if you go quiet, such as calling you and then calling again.

If you use an iPhone, Apple's Check In feature in Messages does the follow-up for you. You can set it to alert a contact when you reach a destination, choosing driving, public transport or walking, or after a timer. If your phone stops making progress, you get a prompt and have 15 minutes to respond before your contact is notified. At the end of a timer you can add 15, 30 or 60 minutes. Both phones need iOS 17 or later. You choose what is shared: Limited sends your current location, battery and signal; Full adds the route you travelled and where your phone was last unlocked.

On Android or across platforms, Google's Location Sharing lets you share your real-time location with people you choose, through apps including Maps and Messages. It is off by default, and you can stop sharing with a particular person from your Google Account under People and sharing.

For a first meeting, pick somewhere public that you know how to get home from, and plan your own travel, so you aren't relying on your date for a lift. Kindrd's guide to first dates that aren't a pub has ideas with natural end times.

At the venue: Ask for Angela

Ask for Angela is a codeword for anyone who feels unsafe, uncomfortable or threatened. You ask staff for 'Angela' and they take it as a quiet request for help. The scheme's own site says trained staff will follow your lead: that might mean helping you leave, supporting you to stay, contacting security or escalating if needed.

Time Out reported in August 2021 that the Met Police, the Mayor of London and Safer Sounds were rolling the scheme out across London, with venue staff given Welfare and Vulnerability Engagement (WAVE) training. The Met had first adopted Ask for Angela in 2016. Today the scheme is run by Ask for Angela CIC, a not-for-profit set up in January 2023. Venues that sign its National Venue Pledge appear on its venue map, so you can check whether your venue takes part before you book.

Not every venue takes part, so look for the posters, usually in the toilets, or check the map. If there is no Angela poster, you can still go to the bar or a door supervisor and say plainly that you need help.

• Ask for AngelaSafety scheme

  London-wide (participating venues)

  Ask staff for 'Angela'; venue map of pledged venues on the scheme's site.

If you think a drink has been spiked

Gov.uk's spiking guidance lists the signs to watch for in yourself or the person you're with: confusion or memory loss, nausea and vomiting, hallucinations or paranoia, poor coordination or vision, and trouble speaking clearly. Spiking can happen to anyone, and it is a crime.

If you think you've been spiked, get medical help first by calling 999 or 111, and ask a friend or venue staff to help. Then report it to the police by calling 999 or 101 as soon as possible. Report quickly: gov.uk says some drugs leave the body in under 12 hours. Police may take a non-invasive urine sample up to seven days after the incident, results come back within three weeks, and testing covers over 100 drugs. Gov.uk advises against relying on self-testing kits, which may be less effective and could weaken a case.

Two worries stop people reporting, and gov.uk addresses both. Having illegal drugs in your system is not a crime unless you're driving. And if it happened in someone's home, reporting won't get the host into trouble unless they did the spiking.

If it's your date or a friend who seems spiked, call 999 or 111, stay with them, and get them home if they're well enough. You can report on their behalf if they can't. If you see someone spike a drink, stop it being drunk, tell staff, and stay to give evidence if you can.

If something happens: sexual assault

The NHS says you can go to a sexual assault referral centre (SARC) for medical care and, if you choose, a forensic examination; you decide which parts to have. A GP, A&E or sexual health clinic can also help. If you think you might want the police to investigate, the NHS suggests a forensic examination as soon as possible and, if you can, not washing or changing first. You can still report if you already have, and you don't have to report at all.

Rape Crisis's support line is 0808 500 2222, free and open 24 hours a day. Victim Support is on 08 08 16 89 111. For harassment or unwanted sexual behaviour on buses, the Tube and trains, TfL's page on reporting sexual offences and harassment lists what you can report and links to its online reporting form.

Hate crime and LGBT+ support

Gov.uk defines hate crimes as crimes against someone because of disability, transgender identity, race, religion or belief, or sexual orientation, including threatening behaviour, assault, harassment and online abuse. Call 999 if a crime is happening or someone is in immediate danger, and 101 otherwise. You can also report online through True Vision (report-it.org.uk), which is run by the National Police Chiefs' Council and links to the police.uk reporting form.

Galop, the LGBT+ anti-abuse charity, says reporting is your choice and that you can get support whether or not you go to the police. It can give independent advice, help you report, and pass on information anonymously. Galop also sets out what you can ask of the police, including that anti-LGBTQ+ abuse is recorded as a hate crime, that you're called by your chosen name and pronouns, and that you're kept updated. Its helpline is 0800 999 5428 or help@galop.org.uk. It is open Monday and Tuesday 9.15am to 8pm and Wednesday to Friday 9.15am to 4.30pm, closed 1pm to 2pm and at weekends. Out of hours, Samaritans is on 116 123, 24 hours a day.

If a date turns into a pattern of control or abuse, the Safe Spaces scheme offers private rooms in participating pharmacies and banks. Ask at the counter to use the Safe Space and you'll be shown to a private room, where you can contact friends, family or support services. Its site has a finder for spaces near you.

• Galop National LGBT+ HelplineHelpline

  National

  0800 999 5428; help reporting hate crime, including anonymously.

• Safe SpacesSupport scheme

  Participating pharmacies and banks

  Private room to contact support; ask at the counter.

Before you go

• Send a friend the venue, your date's name, your expected finish time and when you'll message.
• Set a Check In or share your location, and check your phone is charged.
• Look up whether your venue is on the Ask for Angela map.
• Plan your own way home before you arrive.
• Save Galop (0800 999 5428) and Rape Crisis (0808 500 2222) in your contacts.

Questions people ask

What happens if I ask for Angela?

Staff at a participating venue treat it as a discreet request for help and follow your lead. The scheme says that might mean helping you leave, supporting you to stay, contacting security or escalating if needed.

How soon should I report a suspected spiking?

As soon as you can. Gov.uk says some drugs leave the body in under 12 hours. Police may take a urine sample up to seven days after the incident. Get medical help first by calling 999 or 111.

Will I get in trouble if I had taken drugs and then got spiked?

Gov.uk says having illegal drugs in your system is not a crime unless you are driving, and asks people not to let that stop them reporting.

Can someone help me report homophobic or transphobic abuse?

Yes. Galop says it can give independent advice, help you report to the police, and pass on information anonymously. You can also report online through True Vision or call 101; call 999 in an emergency.